For the past decade or so, my driver’s license has insisted my weight remained at a steady 180. Even though you could flip through the pictures and see my face growing increasingly rounder, the weight stayed the same. The simple reason is, I was in a sort of denial. In my mind, I was still the scrawny kid that could slip behind the school bleachers, *when* they were closed. And whenever I saw a picture or video of myself, I thought, “Wow, the camera really does add 50 lbs!”
As I get older and my various body parts age accordingly, it’s getting harder and harder to admit I’m no longer in the shape I once was. My arms are still skinny and my legs have retained much of their musculature, but the rest of me is a gelatinous mess. I feel like a sausage stuffed into a tube, bursting at the seams. Even my once-proud-to-be-an-inny has popped out, like one of those thermometers telling you the turkey is done.
Well, yes, this turkey is fully cooked, and I can’t take it anymore. So this morning, my girlfriend and I had a consultation with a personal trainer in an attempt to jumpstart our way to a new, healthier us. Okay, so the trainer didn’t show up (family emergency), but we rescheduled it for tomorrow. And we’re determined that even if we don’t opt to go the more expensive personal training route, we are definitely joining the gym.
Last year, I managed to lose over ten pounds merely by watching what I ate. By tracking my caloric intake, I found I felt better, had more energy, and was less likely to catch falling food with my burgeoning belly. Unfortunately, I made the short-sighted decision that I could maintain the weight loss without tracking it. Fast forward a year, and I’m currently being considered for Star Wars Episode VII as one of the Hutts.
So, this time, I’m doing it all. I’m going to eat better, track my food intake, and exercise. I know it’ll be tough, but once I get into the groove of it, I have no doubt I’ll feel better. I’ve let myself go for far too long, so I don’t expect this to be easy. But I know I can do anything I put my mind to (except for finishing NaNo this year… I’ve pretty much given up on that *ahem*).
I’ve got to do this. I deserve to feel better. I owe it to Natalie, for her to have a father who can keep up with her (or try). And I’m doing this for Jenn, because she deserves the best of me.
Most of all, I’m doing it because I really reeeaaaally don’t want to update that damn driver’s license.